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Management Speak: The customer service department is here to stay.
Translation: We’re gutting the customer service department. This is your two weeks notice.
– Anthony Baratta explains the future of customer service.

ManagementSpeak: My door is always open. Let’s have an authentic conversation.

Translation: If you tell me what you really think and it’s not what I want to hear, I’m going to be unhappy and show you my authentic frowny face.

When I read this submission from Will Pearce it gave me an authentic smiley face.

ManagementSpeak: We have preserved our flexibility.
Translation: We managed to avoid making a commitment until we knew which way the wind is blowing.
This week’s contributor preserved his flexibility by remaining anonymous.